Lost Season 1, Episode 2: Tabula Rasa

Previously on Lost... Episode 1 happened.

Episode two is titled "Tabula Rasa" which is Latin for "Episode Two". Our dear friend the US Marshall doesn't waste any time showing Jack some hot mug shots of Kate. Jack writes it off to the ramblings of a crazy person.

Meanwhile, the hike is not going well.

While sitting around a campfire, the Iraqi recreates their flight and ensuing crash on the island with a rock (the island) and a stick which is on fire (as the plane) which, I'm sure, was a little too symbolic for the rest of the castaways. They realize that there is probably no hope because of that French transmission that had been playing for the past 16 years. It's unanimous though, they're going to lie to everyone and tell them that there is, indeed, hope.

Back at camp, Jack and the fat guy talk about how the US Marshall is probably going to die right in front of the poor guy. Fat guy finds the hot mug shot and has one of his trademark freak outs in which he mutters "uh, dude?" a lot. Thus sets up the plot of Episode 2. For those of you just joining us here's a bulleted list

-There's no hope.
-Jack and fat guy now know that Kate once had a mug shot taken of her.

There's some tension about the gun back at camp. They agree to let Kate hold onto it, being the least threatening of the bunch. Oh Sweet Irony! But it's flashback time. Kate is sleeping in a barn with some pigs, like an animal, when an old Australian man finds her. She's quite mysterious, Canadian, and a strong walker, apparently. As for the old man, he has "a hell of a mortgage", a farm he can't take care of and a missing arm. I didn't catch that he was missing an arm the first time I watched this, and thus missed a lot of great arm pun opportunities and also was a little freaked out when his arm comes off later in the episode. Kate decides to lend him a hand in exchange for a place to stay.

The hikers return to camp and flat out lie to everyone. "Oh it's totally cool. Give me your batteries and I'll make the transceiver so awesome." Kate can't keep a goddamn secret, though, and blabs to Jack first chance she gets. She obviously doesn't believe that Jack deserves hope. Jack could give a shit, though, he wants to know what's up with the mug shot. She probably committed credit fraud or something, who cares? Get over it, man. Well, turns out he does get over it. Fat guy, on the other hand, doesn't. He wants to let US Marshall handle it when he gets better but they need some stronger antibiotics. That means it's time for everyone's favorite past time: grave robbing. Jack heads into the plane and runs into that jerk. They commiserate and share tips on robbing the dead. It looks like the robbing went better for asshole than it did for Jack. Then again, porn and cigarettes are more common on an airplane than tetracycline.

As for the rest of our buddies...
The asian guy sends his wife off to get herself cleaned up, Charlie Pace flirts with the pregnant girl, and the cowardly fat guy and Kate have an awkward moment. He notices that she now has a gun and totally freaks out and calls her "dude" a few times.

It starts to rain and everyone runs around setting up tarps and bottles to collect it so that they can have water. Kate checks up on her old friend the Marshall just in time for a flashback!

Kate's making a withdrawal from her bean can bank. The old Australian man apparently pays her $10 a month. Judging by the bills she pulls out. They have a heartwarming exchange and he offers to drive her to the train in the morning instead of her having to walk all night.

Flash forward, the US Marshall starts choking Kate with the very last of his strength, but Jack saves her. Marshall's not doing so hot these days. He needs water and luckily it's pouring out so Jack just drags him out of the tent into the rain and tells him to open his mouth. For a group of people literally surrounded by an ocean, they sure worry about water a lot. It sounds like the end is near for Mr. Marshall, but not soon enough judging by the sounds coming out of him and Kate suggests putting him out of his misery. That's when Jack decided to drop the Mug shot bomb. Harsh.

Flashback!

In the car with ol' one arm who we find out is the only other person on Earth besides me who still listens to Patsy Cline. All of a sudden a younger, healthier, shrapnel free Marshall is driving behind them in a pickup. That fucking dirt farmer sold Kate out. In his defense, he does have one hell of a mortgage.

Flash forward.

Michael and his kid have a little talk about the kid hanging out with Mr. Locke. Michael is worried about his son and being trapped on a desert Island but all the kid cares about is where his dog is. First off, I thought that Vincent was a person up until this point (it's the dog's name). Second, what airline lets you bring big dogs on the damn plane? Third, did the dog have a seatbelt on? Michael goes to look for the mutt in the forest. You know. Where the monster is. He thinks he's being chased by the monster and totally freaks out only to run in on the asian lady bathing. So much better than a monster.

Charlie Pace tries to make friends with Locke. Stick to women, Charlie Pace.

The Iraqi and Jack have a heart to heart. Jack tells him that he's trying to save the guy's life and the Iraqi lets Jack in on a little rumor going around. Mean whilst, Kate and that jerkface build a bonfire and talk about mercy killings and have a few laughs. They talk about the poetic justice involved in using the last bullet to kill the guy. I'd be more worried about polar bears. In fact, I'm always worried about polar bears. Those things are mean! The Marshall uses his last remaining moments on this Earth to badmouth Kate a little more to Jack.

Flashback again!

Kate crashes the truck in a desperate attempt to get away from Marshall, or just to stick it to her farmer friend. She may be going to jail, but she'll die before she lets him have a working truck. After the crash she cools off a bit and decides to drag the guy out of his now burning vehicle. I guess she's not so bad after all. Poor choice, though, cause the Marshall catches up to her.

Flash Forward.

We find out that right before the crash Kate asked Marshall for a favor. Turns out she wanted to make sure the farmer got his money. He did, after all, have one hell of a mortgage. This now makes me wonder if that guy ever DID get his money. Does it still count if she's pronounced dead a week after her plane goes missing over the pacific ocean?

The end of the episode is just a big downer. The asshole tries to mercy kill the Marshall (surprise it's not Kate, also it's at the request of the Marshall) but turns out he's an idiot and shoots him in the chest. You always have to put one in the head, jerk. Shooting a man in the lung does not making dyeing less painful. Jack has to clean up everyone else's mess again and presumably chokes the guy to death. Everyone feels real bad, especially the Marshall, and that's the end for him.

In the morning, Mr. Locke starts blowing into a dog whistle he made only to see eight angry polar bears run out of the forest. No, I'm just kidding, he uses the whistle to find Vincent, who I will remind you is actually a dog. He lets Michael take the credit for finding the dog, being the good natured man that he is. The kid, Walt, is happy. The dog, Vincent, looks pissed. Probably because he was free to run around the island for a glorious day and now he's stuck on a leash again. Last time he'll run toward a mysterious high pitched noise.

Jack decides that Kate deserves a second chance for on this island he is judge, jury and executioner, and his word is law. Lets hope he's also a good monster killer.

This episode earns an orange frown for being generally depressing except for the upbeat musical montage at the end where you find out that the asian guy loves his wife, the annoying kid fixes his sisters sunglasses, Charlie Pace draws on his fingers some more, the iraqi gives the asshole a fruit, and Vincent who is a dog is reunited with Walt who is a kid, and Walt has renewed respect for Mercutio... I mean Michael.



Lost.